{"id":6737,"date":"2026-02-23T18:02:01","date_gmt":"2026-02-23T18:02:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/?p=6737"},"modified":"2026-02-23T18:11:55","modified_gmt":"2026-02-23T18:11:55","slug":"dating-deja-vu-per-que-sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/dating-deja-vu-per-que-sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles\/","title":{"rendered":"Dating d\u00e9j\u00e0 vu, Per qu\u00e8 sempre trio malament les meves parelles?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<div class=\"wp-block-rank-math-toc-block\" id=\"rank-math-toc\"><p><strong><strong>Taula de contiguts<\/strong><\/strong><\/p><nav><ol><li class=\"\"><a href=\"#que-es-el-dating-deja-vu\">Qu\u00e8 \u00e9s el dating d\u00e9j\u00e0 vu?<\/a><\/li><li class=\"\"><a href=\"#els-fantasmes-de-la-relacio\">Els \u201cfantasmes de la relaci\u00f3\u201d<\/a><\/li><li class=\"\"><a href=\"#bernstein-identifica-tres-factors-que-mantenen-aquest-cercle\">Bernstein identifica tres factors que mantenen aquest cercle:<\/a><\/li><li class=\"\"><a href=\"#quan-els-traumes-es-cerquen-entre-si\">Quan els traumes es cerquen entre si<\/a><\/li><li class=\"\"><a href=\"#el-primer-pas-prendre-consciencia\">El primer pas: prendre consci\u00e8ncia<\/a><\/li><\/ol><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>\u00c9s una de les frases m\u00e9s repetides a consulta: \u201csempre em fixo en les persones equivocades\u201d. Despr\u00e9s de diverses relacions frustrades, la pregunta sorgeix inevitable: per qu\u00e8 trope\u00e7o una vegada i una altra amb la mateixa pedra?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>T\u2019has sorpr\u00e8s mai pensant \u201caix\u00f2 ja ho he viscut\u201d en iniciar una relaci\u00f3? A aquest fenomen se l\u2019anomena <em><strong>dating d\u00e9j\u00e0 vu<\/strong><\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"que-es-el-dating-deja-vu\">Qu\u00e8 \u00e9s el <em>dating d\u00e9j\u00e0 vu<\/em>?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>\u00c9s la sensaci\u00f3 que, encara que la persona sigui diferent, la relaci\u00f3 segueix un gui\u00f3 molt semblant. Al principi tot sembla prometedor, per\u00f2 aviat emergeixen les mateixes dificultats: apareixen din\u00e0miques familiars com dist\u00e0ncia, cr\u00edtiques, depend\u00e8ncia o manca de comprom\u00eds, i la relaci\u00f3 acaba amb la mateixa frustraci\u00f3 de sempre.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>El <em>dating d\u00e9j\u00e0 vu<\/em> sol apar\u00e8ixer per diversos motius:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Filtres interns: triem en funci\u00f3 de creences disfuncionals, com \u201csi m\u2019hi esfor\u00e7o, m\u2019estimaran\u201d o \u201cl\u2019amor fa mal\u201d.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>All\u00f2 familiar atreu: busquem inconscientment all\u00f2 que coneixem, encara que ens faci mal.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Cercle de refor\u00e7: cada relaci\u00f3 fallida reafirma aquestes creences, com \u201cnom\u00e9s em toquen parelles aix\u00ed\u201d, mantenint el patr\u00f3.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Sovint creiem que \u201cfallem\u201d perqu\u00e8 ens enamorem de la persona equivocada o no escoltem els senyals. Per\u00f2 no \u00e9s aix\u00f2: l\u2019autentic problema \u00e9s que no tenim una estructura interna clara des de la qual triar. Confonem connexi\u00f3 amb compatibilitat, intensitat amb amor o dolor amb import\u00e0ncia. Sense una base s\u00f2lida d\u2019autoestima, l\u00edmits i consci\u00e8ncia emocional, \u00e9s f\u00e0cil deixar-se endur per din\u00e0miques que despr\u00e9s resulten nocives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image aligncenter size-full\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"845\" height=\"321\" src=\"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/el-dating-deja-vu.jpg\" alt=\"Qu\u00e8 \u00e9s el dating d\u00e9j\u00e0 vu?\" class=\"wp-image-6741\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/el-dating-deja-vu.jpg 845w, https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/el-dating-deja-vu-300x114.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/el-dating-deja-vu-768x292.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 845px) 100vw, 845px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"els-fantasmes-de-la-relacio\">Els \u201cfantasmes de la relaci\u00f3\u201d<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>El psic\u00f2leg Jeffrey Bernstein anomena aix\u00ed les empremtes emocionals que arrosseguem d\u2019experi\u00e8ncies passades: relacions pr\u00e8vies, din\u00e0miques familiars, ruptures doloroses o missatges transmesos a la inf\u00e0ncia. Aquests \u201cfantasmes\u201d s\u2019activen en noves relacions i poden fer que repetim els mateixos patrons una vegada i una altra.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Per exemple, si v\u00e0res cr\u00e9ixer amb la idea que \u201cperqu\u00e8 m\u2019estimin m\u2019he d\u2019esfor\u00e7ar molt\u201d, \u00e9s possible que tri\u00efs parelles on constantment hagis de demostrar el teu valor. O si vas viure abandonament, potser toleres actituds nocives per a que no et deixin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Els nostres patrons amorosos o \u201c<strong>patrons de relaci\u00f3 disfuncionals<\/strong>\u201d s\u00f3n guions inconscients que repetim sense adonar-nos-en. Per exemple: sentir que la nostra missi\u00f3 \u00e9s \u201carreglar\u201d l\u2019altre.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>El nostre cervell tendeix a cercar all\u00f2 familiar, fins i tot si all\u00f2 familiar fa mal. Les creences disfuncionals actuen com a filtres: ens atrauen certs trets i passem per alt senyals d\u2019alerta. Aix\u00ed, reforcem la mateixa din\u00e0mica una vegada i una altra.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"bernstein-identifica-tres-factors-que-mantenen-aquest-cercle\">Bernstein identifica tres factors que mantenen aquest cercle:<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Falsa esperan\u00e7a: pensar que \u201caquesta vegada ser\u00e0 diferent\u201d.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Refor\u00e7 emocional: confondre la muntanya russa d\u2019emocions intenses amb amor vertader.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Por al canvi: \u201cval m\u00e9s dolent conegut que bo per con\u00e8ixer\u201d.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Aquests patrons, encara que dolorosos, repliquen din\u00e0miques apreses a la inf\u00e0ncia o en relacions primerenques. Per aix\u00f2, de vegades confonem all\u00f2 conegut amb all\u00f2 segur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"quan-els-traumes-es-cerquen-entre-si\">Quan els traumes es cerquen entre si<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Persones que han viscut inf\u00e0ncies complexes o traumes emocionals tendeixen a vincular-se amb parelles que han tingut experi\u00e8ncies similars. All\u00f2 que ens resulta conegut pot semblar-nos segur, encara que no ho sigui. Si alg\u00fa va cr\u00e9ixer amb abandonament, cr\u00edtiques o manca d\u2019afecte, pot sentir-se atret per parelles que repeteixen aquestes din\u00e0miques, perqu\u00e8 \u201csona a casa\u201d, encara que sigui nociu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Inconscientment, busquem en la parella l\u2019oportunitat de reparar all\u00f2 que no vam poder resoldre a la inf\u00e0ncia. Dues persones amb ferides semblants poden recon\u00e8ixer-se m\u00fatuament en el dolor i generar una connexi\u00f3 intensa a l\u2019inici. Per\u00f2 si aquestes ferides no estan treballades, en lloc de sanar-se, s\u2019activen i retroalimenten, generant relacions inestables, amb molta c\u00e0rrega emocional.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"el-primer-pas-prendre-consciencia\">El primer pas: prendre consci\u00e8ncia<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Trencar amb aquests patrons \u00e9s possible. La clau est\u00e0 a identificar-los i treballar sobre les creences que els sostenen. Aix\u00f2 implica:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Recon\u00e8ixer quin tipus de patr\u00f3 predomina en les meves eleccions.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Observar quines emocions i pensaments es repeteixen en les meves relacions.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Explorar l\u2019origen d\u2019aquestes creences (per exemple, din\u00e0miques familiars).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Aprendre a establir l\u00edmits i valorar relacions basades en respecte mutu.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Des de la <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/psicologia-general-sanitaria\/\">ter\u00e0pia cognitivo-conductual<\/a><\/strong>, aquest proc\u00e9s s\u2019acompanya amb estrat\u00e8gies per reprogramar les creences disfuncionals i enfortir l\u2019autoestima, que actua com a br\u00faixola cap a eleccions m\u00e9s sanes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Pots rompre el patr\u00f3 i trobar una parella diferent amb qui tenir una relaci\u00f3 m\u00e9s sana.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong><em>J\u00falia Taranc\u00f3n Estades<\/em><\/strong><br><strong><em>Psic\u00f2loga General Sanit\u00e0ria<br>Col\u00b7legiada B-03232<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00c9s una de les frases m\u00e9s repetides a consulta: \u201csempre em fixo en les persones equivocades\u201d. Despr\u00e9s de diverses relacions [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6740,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6737","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sexualitat-i-parelles"],"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles.jpg",1200,782,false],"thumbnail":["https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles-150x150.jpg",150,150,true],"medium":["https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles-300x196.jpg",300,196,true],"medium_large":["https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles-768x500.jpg",768,500,true],"large":["https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles-1024x667.jpg",1024,667,true],"1536x1536":["https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles.jpg",1200,782,false],"2048x2048":["https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/sempre-trio-malament-les-meves-parelles.jpg",1200,782,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"Instituto Psicolog\u00eda Sexolog\u00eda","author_link":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/author\/admin\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"\u00c9s una de les frases m\u00e9s repetides a consulta: \u201csempre em fixo en les persones equivocades\u201d. Despr\u00e9s de diverses relacions [&hellip;]","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6737","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6737"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6737\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6742,"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6737\/revisions\/6742"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6740"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6737"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6737"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.psicologiasexologiamallorca.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6737"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}